Burgers near me roughly in order of best to worst. Factors include price, convenience to me, and quality of the bun, patty, and flavors.
Steakhouse burgers
The distinguishing factor for steakhouse burger is the looser grind. Steakhouse patties are never pressed.
Second Bar + Kitchen
$$$ Patty – A, Bun – A, Atmosphere – Restaurant
One of the most expensive burgers, but worth it.
Last tested: 2015-03
Frequency: about 2 times a year
Hopdoddy
$$ Patty – C, Bun – A, Atmosphere – Diner
Overpriced burger. Avoid the “premium” meats. Very overpriced shakes. Not worth waiting in line for.
Last tested: 2018
Frequency: about 1 time a year
Quick-service burgers
Quick-service establishments press their patties so they cook faster.
Counter Cafe
$$ Patty – B, Bun – A, Atmosphere – Diner
The $10 happy hour special is a great deal
Last tested: 2018
Frequency: 3 times a year
Jo’s Cafe
$$ Patty – B, Bun – B, Atmosphere – Cafe
Great flavor combinations and excellent attention to detail.
Frequency: not enough
P. Terry’s
$ Patty – B, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Fast Food
There’s something magical about these.
Last tested: 2019
Frequency: about 8 times a year
Texas Chili Parlor
$$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Texas Chili Parlor
My raw ratings aren’t that good, but they make a damn good burger. They don’t have fries on the menu.
Last tested: 2014
Frequency: about once a year
Pluckers
$$ Patty – B, Bun – B, Atmosphere – Bar
Another place you normally wouldn’t go to get a burger. This wing joint has a good basic burger. Patty is better than average, the bun is sometimes an A.
Last tested: 2015
Frequency: about twice a year
Whataburger
$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Fast Food
If you’re in the mood for Whataburger, nothing else will satisfy it.
Last tested: 2015
Frequency: about 8 times a year
 Sullivan’s
$$ Patty – B, Bun – B, Atmosphere – Steakhouse
I remember this being good. Needs to be re-tested.
Annie’s Cafe & Bar
$$$ Patty – B, Bun – B, Atmosphere – Cafe
I remember this being good. Needs to be re-tested. I also remember the duck fat fries being good.
Roaring Fork
$$ Patty – B, Bun – B, Atmosphere – Steakhouse
They only have one burger, the Big Ass Burger. It is great. Strong, basic ingredients (thick bacon, melty cheese). The establishment is really more a restaurant than a steakhouse, but the atmosphere is steakhouse. Update: I think the quality has gone downhill. My last Big Ass Burger was kind of terrible.
Last tested: 2015-02
Frequency: about twice a year
Parkside
$$ Patty – B, Bun – D, Atmosphere – Restaurant
Good burger, overrated. Would be one of the best patties, but mine had too much gristle.
Last tested: 2015-03
Iron Cactus
$$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Restaurant
The patty is a little unusual. It’s a nicer fast food patty: fine grind and molded. The fries are lightly battered and great.
Last tested: 2013?
Wendy’s
Pretzel: $ Patty – C, Bun – B, Atmosphere – Fast Food
Not bad. Was lured here by the marketing for their pretzel bun.
Dirty Martin’s
$$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Diner
Needs to be retested. I haven’t been here in over a decade.
Camino El Casino
$$ Patty – C, Bun – D, Atmosphere – Bar
Better when drunk.
Hut’s
$$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Diner
Overrated. Avoid. I haven’t been here in probably six years, but including them for completeness.
24 Diner
$$$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Diner
Avoid the burger, just get the $20 chicken and waffles. Shake was weak too.
Last tested: 2013
Other places I like but aren’t “central”
Phil’s Ice House
$$ Patty – B, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Fast Food
Last tested: 2015-06
Frequency: about 3 times a year
Places to try
Elevation Burger
RIP
Svantes Stuffed Burger
$$ Patty – A, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Food Truck
Space Jam
Last tested:
Frequency: about twice a year
Peached Tortilla JapaJam Burger
$$ Patty – B, Bun, B, Atmosphere – Food Truck
Great flavor combination. If you’ve ever been to Umami Burger in LA, this is like that, but better.
Last tested:
Frequency: not enough
Wholly Cow
$$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Diner
Convenient. Local ingredients. Too bad they cook the hell out of ’em.
Player’s
$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Diner
Get ’em while you can, UT owns the land under them and has the option to kick them out with six months notice. You can get a comically large shake here.
EZ’s
$$ Patty – C, Bun: C, Atmosphere: Diner
Decent. Okay shakes, they definitely used to be better.
Bacon
$$ Patty – C, Bun – C, Atmosphere – Cafe
The bacon… is ok, but you can customize it and try different kinds of bacon. Note: the house bacon usually isn’t that crispy because it’s so thick.
Last tested: 2014